Down the Backstretch Conducts Push Poll for Gravy

Down the Backstretch, generally considered a reliable news source for Minnesota's running community, appears to have engaged in push polling over the weekend on behalf of Gravy. A poll conducted during the Thanksgiving holiday purports to identify the favorite Thanksgiving foods of DtB readers. Unfortunately, the poll's many structural and methodological problems reveal it to be, at best, a viral marketing effort to inflate the value of Gravy, possibly with the aim of destroying Turkey.

The single-question poll asked participants, "What are your favorite Thanksgiving foods?" We will not attempt to quantify the implications of the obvious drafting flaw, except to note that many readers may have mistakenly believed they would be able to select more than one item from the list. Those respondents would have been less likely to prioritize among their top choices, making the poll less likely to reflect their true favorites. Respondents were given the option of changing their vote but DtB refuses to provide any data on how many actually did.

A substantially larger problem is how DtB framed its single question. A press release issued when the poll opened on Tuesday, November 25th editorialized, "We think underrated (and un-ranked) Gravy is primed for a break-out performance in 2008." By implying the correct response, DtB effectively changed its question to, "Do you disagree that Gravy is underrated?" This is a classic example of push-polling, and it is irresponsible at best, morally reprehensible at worst.

Many readers will certainly agree that this was merely irresponsible. After all, Gravy finished fifth of six, well behind Stuffing and Mashed Potatoes. The perennial favorites carried the day and Gravy only received one more vote than lowly Cranberries. No harm, no foul.

That would be true if a closer examination of these results did not reveal a much stronger performance for Gravy. First of all, Gravy entered the poll unranked but still earned a respectable 13% of the vote. It beat a ranked opponent in the process and improved on its sixth-place finish in 2007. Taken together it seems clear that Gravy exceeded expectations in a year that DtB's poll suggested Gravy should exceed expectations.

A second indicator, however, is even more revealing. Mashed Potatoes skyrocketed from fourth-place in 2007 to second-place in 2008, just four percentage points out of first. And while it may be true that some (freaks) love the simple, unadulterated taste of dry Mashed Potatoes, it is common knowledge that most people enjoy Mashed Potatoes best when they act as a vehicle for Gravy. To the extent that a vote for Mashed Potatoes is at least a fractional vote for Gravy, a significant proportion of Mashed Potatoes' 2008 improvement may be attributable to DtB's push-poll. Indeed, evidence shows that Gravy has a similar, if less significant, effect on Stuffing performance.

In other words, DtB not only framed its question such that Gravy was likely to exceed expectations, it also offered at least three different avenues by which respondents could, and did, indicate some preference for Gravy. Any comprehensive analysis would have to conclude both, (1) that Gravy did, in fact, enjoy the breakout performance DtB predicted and; (2) that Gravy's breakout was not so much predicted by DtB as created by the DtB poll.

The lingering question for Minnesotans wondering where to turn for reliable local running news is Why. Certainly DtB would not be the first good-hearted start-up tempted by the Gravy Train. But what about the harm visited upon Turkey this weekend? The holiday's signature food not only fell to fourth-place, but at meals across the state Gravy literally harvested Turkey's innards for its own use. If Gravy continues to expand its empire at Turkey's expense we will soon sip our Thanksgiving dinners from ladles. Our children may never know the majesty of the forgotten bird, speaking colloquially of Gravy-Day as our ears echo with hallow dissonance. Did DtB willfully and knowingly contribute to this weekend's Turkey obliteration? The public demands to know the full extent of DtB's relationship with Gravy, and what future intentions the alliance has towards Turkey.

SCRC Voting Bloc Dominates Planning Meeting, Pizza Eating

On Monday, November 24th the Slab City Running Company delegation to the USATF-MN Team Circuit Planning Meeting successfully passed a number of key measures expected to help The Company in 2009. The delegation also ate, like, 900 pieces of pizza. First time delegate, Dan "Chapel" Church, observed, "That was awesome!"

The meeting featured votes on several proposed revisions to the Circuit's scoring procedure, and also all-you-can eat pizza for $10. Slab City's five-person delegation helped pass a measure that will allow teams to drop their worst race from their total score and one that cuts the number of runners on a complete scoring team from five to three for races 15K and longer. The Company displayed intimidating strength by voting together on these measures early in the evening, and also by eating, like, six whole pizzas before the early votes had even been tallied.

The Company delegation was only outnumbered by the Molar Milers Caucus, but the meager difference in voting strength is preserved in the form of Grandma's Marathon's inclusion on the 2009 Circuit. Slab City's delegation, meanwhile, was successful in tipping several votes that prevented the early-season calendar from becoming too cluttered. Slab City's delegation was also successful in tipping several trays of pizza onto The Company's table. Asked for his feelings on losing the Grandma's Marathon vote, first time Slab City delegate, Ross Rankin, explained, "Sure, I would have preferred to have Twin Cities be the Circuit marathon, but I also would have preferred less salad at the buffet. I mean, salad? C'mon."

Veteran delegate, Matt Gehring, echoed his sentiments. "I think the important thing to remember is that even though the Rice Street Mile isn't on the 2009 Circuit, we still ate a ton of pizza." In fact, Ben Ho suggested that by winning the evening's early voting The Company was able to focus on its dominant pizza-eating during the scheduling votes. "We'll be able to field teams relatively easily for most of these races, and even if we can't we'll be able to drop our lowest score. On the other hand, tonight was our only shot at this pizza. I think some of these teams may have miscalculated."

The scoring rules adopted for 2009 are:

New Scoring System for 2009
a) Points awarded based on the number of teams competing at each race. If nine (9) teams participate in a race, the first place team will receive nine (9) points, 2nd place will receive eight (8) points, and so on, until the 9th place team receives one (1) point. Every complete team will be award at minimum one (1) point. The minimum winning point total for open teams will be five (5) points, for masters, four (4) points, and for grand master's, three (3) points, regardless of number of teams that officially score.

Example:

Race #1
Open Men (11 teams)
1. Team A - 11 points
2. Team B – 10 points
3. Team C – 9 points
11. Team K – 1 point

Master's Women (2 teams)
1. Team A – 4 points
2. Team B – 3 points

b) Each team will be allowed to discard the lowest score earned throughout the circuit. If the team circuit is composed of ten (10) races, the end of the year totals will reflect the nine (9) highest places earned.

c) The final USATF Minnesota Championship Race in 2009 will count as double points.

Definition of the Open Scoring Team
An open team will consist of 5 scoring members for distances under 15 kilometers. For distance of 15 kilometers and over, a scoring team will consist of 3 scoring members.

The 2009 Circuit Schedule is:

March 22 - The Human Race 8K - USATF Minnesota Championship
April 25 - Get In Gear 10K - USATF Minnesota Championship
May 7 - TC 1 Mile - USATF Minnesota Championship
May 25 - Brian Kraft Memorial 5K - USATF Minnesota Championship
June 20 - Grandma's Marathon - USATF Minnesota Championship
July 25 - Lumberjack Days 10 Mile
August 2 - Hennepin Lake Classic 5K
August 9 - MDRA Minnesota 15K - USATF Minnesota Championship
September 13 - City of Lakes 25K - USATF Minnesota Championship

The Circuit's pizza source should be restocked here.

Winds of Change: The Collegeville Circuit Revolution

Slab City Running Company's spiritual rivals, Collegeville, have always been famous for the amount of wind they generate. This fall Minnesota running fans are asking themselves, is it just wind? Or, is it wind of change?



Collegeville finished fourth on the 2008 Road Circuit for the second consecutive year, but they closed with series of strong performances including an impressive second-place showing at the MDRA 15K. The motley collection of jovial ex-MIAC runners finished the season just three points out of third-place. Representatives of the Circuit's ancien-regime were nervous, but they also assumed that colder weather would weaken Collegeville's resolve and quash any attempted November Revolution.

Instead, the ancien-regime fell on Sunday, November 8th 2008. Collegeville recorded a convincing victory at the USATF-MN Cross Country Championships and won the USATF-MN Cross Country Team Circuit. Of course, the quality of competition on the Cross Country Circuit is compromised because Slab City does not participate, choosing instead to spend the fall gaining weight and otherwise preparing to hibernate. Even without The Company's weighty presence, however, Collegeville's victory must be recognized as a significant moment in Circuit history.

We at Slab City therefore take this moment's pause from our November weight-gain to salute Collegeville for blowing fresh winds of change in the faces of the Minnesota running community. And while it is true that Slab City would very likely have won the Cross Country Circuit by much, much more if we had been in shape to do so, the Collegeville Revolution ought not be overlooked. Our sincere congratulations.

Now, brace yourselves to experience the crushing weight of the 2009 Slab City Running Company Counter-Revolution.

The 2008 Circuit Wrap

Aye, November, and another USATF-MN Road Racing Circuit has fallen from time like skeletal maple leaves wafting to the frosty earth against autumn's dying glow. We who raced it, lived it, and now months removed need no reminders save the scars on our souls and the victories in our hearts. We swallow the warm mouthfuls of tea and soak the morsels of cake that bear unflinchingly, in the tiny and almost impalpable drop of their essence, the vast structure of recollection: Slab City Running Company kicked some serious boo-tay in 2008.

Slab City detractors have rightly observed that The Company managed only a fifth place finish. True enough, but those final team standings remain the only piece of evidence suggesting that Slab City Running Company is not the best team on the circuit. In fact, The Company matched it's 2007 performance and also experienced significant growth over the final races of the season. After perennial leader and Company co-founder, Chris "Bizyah" Lundberg, left for the wilds of Idaho several Slab City rookies carried the team through the august August competition.

Ben Merchant led the squad and impressed his mother by doubling at the Hennepin-Lake Classic. Andy Jahn made his Slab City debut in fine style with a near-PR shirtless 10K, and Tom Church returned to the scoring ranks with his 5K performance. Matt Gehring and Phil Schrader also dizzied themselves around Lake Calhoun to clinch The Company's fifth-place showing. Ben Ho, meanwhile, anchored The Company booster squad by arriving prepared to run even though he was still recovering from racing the Chisago Lakes Half-Ironman Triathlon the previous weekend.

Just one week after Hennepin-Lake, Andy Jahn returned to lead The Company and relieve Reuben Woodruff of his state record for 22 year-olds at the MDRA 15K. Reuben, undeterred, thrashed his way to a 55:07, and Ross Rankin made his Slab City debut with an as-advertised 57:09. Triathlons can only keep Ben Ho down for so long, and he joined Matt Gehring to clinch another fifth place finish and to guarantee that Slab City would finish no lower than fifth overall for the season.

With little left for The Company to prove, Paul Fischer and Ross Rankin each showed the strength that would serve them well at the Twin Cities Marathon by turing in impressive performances at the City of Lakes 25K. Paul led the team as Ross continued building a reputation worthy of challenging Bryan Donald for the position of Slab City Metronome. Sadly, the day's most impressive performance did not register favorably in the results. Dan "Chapel" Church completed the 25K in 1:44:32. His fastest miles, however, were those he completed before the race began, dashing from his car to the starting line after misplacing Lake Harriet. Lake Harriet, as so many of us have learned, waits for no man, and so began the 25K while Chapel was still two sprinting minutes away from the starting line. He did well to finish the race at all, but completing his two fastest miles en route to the course left him depleted and The Company celebrated the racing equivalent of a Golden Birthday on the seventh.

At season's end, fifth-place Slab City was 18-points ahead of the sixth-place Molar Milers, and ahead of more than half of The Company's Circuit rivals. Strong performances from Paul Fischer, Ross Rankin, Tom Church and Ben Ho on Twin Cities weekend suggest The Company is poised to chip away at Collegeville's 11-point fourth-place margin and Ford's 14-point third-place margin. Until then we toast Company Runner of the Year, Ben Merchant, for leading the team at six of nine races and Company Co-Rookies of the Year, Ben Ho and Paul Fisher. Toasts and teas preserve our memories through these winter months, as we prepare to greet 2009 with supple mind and limb.

Experts Predict Rash of Updates to Slab City Blog!

Experts are predicting a rash of updates to the Slab City Running Company team blog this weekend. Sources close to the proceedings estimate that by the time the Thanksgiving weekend is over the site could be updated as many as four times. The sudden rash of updates would mark a radical departure from the site's recent no-update approach.

After months of wasting time pursuing activities ranging from running to not-running, the site's editor has decided to restore blogging to his list of time wasting pursuits. A source familiar with the editor's writing process says that the timing for these updates was predictable. "Now that the holidays are here, he definitely has many more important responsibilities. Family, friends, work, maintaining his health. With everything else that should take priority, I wouldn't be surprised if we saw six or seven updates before the weekend is over."

That estimate sounded high to one observer. "He won't have internet access for a couple of days. I think four updates is likely, but the balance will be weighted toward the end of the weekend."

Experts are still examining the relationship between the editor's renewed consumption of coffee and the anticipated updates.

Jessica Deutsch, another source close to the proceedings, explained, "Get off the compu